Seize the day

I've been missing Miss K like crazy. I think she doesn't miss me that much; which is good for her. I'm considering to invite her living with me for the rest of 9 months in Bloomington. I can't just take her here without knowing how she's going to feel about living in a new place with completely new situation and arrangement. She's a complete person with brain and heart and I'm afraid that she will be dissapointed just like most people are feeling when they have to start living the Bloomington way. I am okay with the town (it's actually close to what I imagined) since I decided it myself. But what about her when most part of decision will not be on her?

I keep asking myself why I would take her here. Well, frankly speaking, it's me who needs her to support me and as a mother I need to know everything about my little girl. I'm kind a person who doesn't like to be surprised. And I experienced a lot of surprising moment, both good and bad, about her since I left. Second, I don't wanna lose anymore time with her. As I always keep in mind, she will grow up very fast before finally be able to make up her own decision and be more independent of me. I wanna enjoy every minute left.

But then the questions keep going. What can I offer her? What kind of life I can give her? Certainly, it will not be an easy one for both of us. Financially, I am just at par with my income. With regard to time management, I assume that I'll be so much smarter next semester that I'll be able to take care the business (classes, reading materials, assignments, group meetings) during daylight before I pick her up from the childcare at 5.30 pm. I pray that this assumption would be valid. In health issue, I will make sure that she would get the immunization complete; I'll manage the health insurance as well as healthy meals (it'll be challenging.....:)).

I will plan it carefully but I just let the final decision rest on Him. If I can bring her here, I hope Miss K and I will have fun gazing the stars in some midsummer nights, going to the theater, swimming, going to the zoo or museum or library, watching some games at the stadium, cooking together, dining out, or just walking inside my campus and having some friendly chats. I really hope that our decision to invite her to come here is the right thing to do. I hope she'll be happy here even if she finds out that things are not as great as she thought. I hope she will feel well-fulfilled just being with me. I know I am when I'm with her.